


All The Things We Haven't Said

by Leviusify



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Anxiety, Bernadetta has Selective Mutism, F/M, Fluff, Mutism, Nervous, Paranoia, Paranoid Fantasy, Paranoid Violence, Romantic Fantasies, Social Anxiety, crippling anxiety - Freeform, imaginary violence, romantic fantasy, selective mutism, soft, supportive
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-18 05:13:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29728851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leviusify/pseuds/Leviusify
Summary: Byleth Eisner is a new professor at Garreg Mach monastery, and encounters a peculiar student on his first day of teaching. Bernadetta Von Varley is a selective mute with horrible social anxiety that wishes she would never have to see another person in her whole life. When Byleth starts warming up to her, how will the troubled student react?
Relationships: My Unit | Byleth & Bernadetta von Varley, My Unit | Byleth/Bernadetta von Varley
Comments: 2
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Full disclosure: I do not personally suffer from selective mutism and do not know anyone that does. However, keep in mind that this work was written with lots of research put into it and the best interests in mind. If you have any thoughts or complaints, please comment and I will be sure to address them. Have fun reading!

Byleth was actually rather excited to start his time as professor for the Black Eagles class. He had not been one for the bickering and politicking of nobles, and considering that commoner and noble alike mingled amongst the student body, it would seem that would be absent from Garreg Mach. After years on the battlefield with Jeralt, it might be a nice break to spread his firsthand knowledge to a new generation of generals. 

The place itself was more regal than the rundown taverns and hastily made camps that he’d spent most of his life in. Although, he wasn’t sure if this group of heirs of noble houses were ready to do battle and take human lives. He would have to cross that bridge when he came to it. He had reviewed the textbooks briefly that he was supposed to teach the students with, and it seemed he possessed more than enough knowledge to effectively teach the class. He didn’t mind the Black Eagles from what he had seen of them, but he wouldn’t mind if he got transferred to another class. At this point, he had not met enough of the student body to really be picky. 

Speaking of which, this first day would be an excellent time to get to know them. They’d chatted a bit before class started, especially with Edelgard, the class head. He had a vague description of each of the students from the attendance logbook as well. He was in his classroom (his very own classroom!) early, awaiting the students to file in. The bell rang out a chipper tune, and students immediately began filing in. Byleth put on his best winning smile, which Jeralt said made people feel more comfortable. Byleth couldn’t see why. He began to put faces to names as the students found their desks. Edelgard and her guard Hubert, those were recognizable. Caspar was likely the blue haired athletic looking student who was chatting with the taller orange haired Ferdinand, the baggy eyed Lindhardt, and the two girls, Petra and Dorothea walked in next to each other. Byleth immediately noted the face markings of Petra. He had heard of the transfer from Brigid, and he assumed he’d found her. As the sound of idle chatter filled the room, he took his quill and marked all as present. As his feather flew down the list, it landed at one name at the end. One “Bernadetta Von Varley.” Must have snuck in while he was taking a gander at the class. But when he looked up, eyes scanning the classroom again, he didn’t see her. He checked his class notes again, eyes glazing over the entry of the other students before it landed on Bernadetta’s. Age, physical appearance, Von Varley estate, and then suddenly Byleth’s eyes caught on one particular note, seemingly added in after the thought, presumably by Seteth, who seemed to be the administrator of the student body. “Behavioral Issues.” Would explain being late to class. 

Byleth was prepared to become a rough and tumble authoritative figure when it came to the mystery student, but when the door to the classroom creaked open, it was crystal clear that such treatment wouldn’t be needed. A short, purple haired girl, with eyes Byleth had seen many times before, on twitchy mercenaries in Jeralt’s retinues, or the eyes of a wounded enemy staggering away from the battlefield, watching to see who could be his eventual undoing. She sat down at the back of the class, but had an entire table to herself, the rest of the class sitting in the front two tables (with the exception of Lindhardt, who was picking at his nails near the back, but at a separate table than Bernadetta). He took a deep breath, and began to teach. Today’s lesson was on basic weapon handling and maintenance.

It was about a half hour into class, and unusual for his typical social brevity, Byleth was able to go into extensive detail about their lesson. He covered every point they would need to know and more, and had more than enough knowledge to answer any questions the class had to ask. He’d noticed that this class got along quite well with each other, and even the transfer student, Petra, was more than excited to put in her fair share of questions. Lindhardt, although quiet, proved himself to be quite an adept listener when he called upon him to answer a question about proper medical treatment of warhorses. But as time elapsed, he noticed Bernadetta’s behavior, or lack thereof. She took notes astutely, but when offering up an opportunity to answer a question, her hand never raised, nor did she ever ask a question of her own. Maybe Byleth had to push her into the lake for her to learn to swim, so to speak. 

First he would need a little white lie. Currently on the board was a detailed depiction of typically issued plate armor. Byleth cleared his throat. “Many forms of plate armor can be quite resistant to arrow based attack, unless you know the right tricks. Is anyone here an archer, or studying to be one?” Byleth already knew that was Bernadetta’s career of choice, and tested the waters to see if she would speak up. He looked into her general direction, and noticed her cowering a bit. Before Byleth could conveniently remember Bernadetta’s ambitions, Caspar spoke up. “Bernadetta’s handy with a bow, right Bernadetta?” Byleth smiled a bit at her. “Is that so?” and waited.

And waited.

Bernadetta seemed to be incredibly resistant to giving up her deadly secret of being good with a bow, because for some reason she simply was not talking. It had easily been 10 or 15 seconds, and Byleth had not heard a single “um” or “ah” that would mean she was trying to formulate some sort of thought. She had not teared up as if Byleth had brought up a bad memory, she had not waived him away as if she was busy, she had simply frozen, seemingly in fear. Her face was pale, and although her mouth did not move, her eyes jittered and swung around wildly. Byleth smiled and spoke. “We’ll come back to you, if you want.” He returned his attention back to the board and began drawing out the structure of a plate regiment with the chalk.

The bell rang out a chipper tune, and everyone began gathering their materials to return to the mess hall for lunch. But before one particular student could leave, Byleth called out. “Bernadetta, can you stay a bit longer?” The girl froze up, but didn’t leave. Everyone else poured out of the classroom, and Byleth walked towards Bernadetta, and crouched down. He pulled out his notebook and quill, and showed her a page, one that he had been writing while the class filled out an assignment he handed out. Bernadetta’s eyes glanced at the page, her body still halfway turned towards the door. Slowly, but surely, her hands reached towards the book and quill. Her temperament, like a cornered animal, ever so slightly relaxed as she read what was on the page.

“Hello Bernadetta!

I’m really excited to have you in my class. It is okay if you don’t want to answer my questions.

If you want to have me not call on you, please write it here. If you want, maybe we can do private training sessions instead of lectures if that would make you more comfortable? It’s your decision.”

A large blank space was left below it, presumably so Bernadetta could write in. At this point, Bernadetta unfortunately had to shift her full body towards Byleth. She held the book in one hand and quill in the other. Shakily, she lifted the quill towards the notebook, and began to write. Judging by her hand’s fluid movements with the quill, it seems like her hands were quite accompanied to the use of one. Byleth waited, and tried to look back at his chalkboard so she wouldn’t feel pressured. Or maybe he should look at her so she would be reassured. Byleth was never one for social situations. Bernadetta eventually stopped writing with the quill, but she didn’t hand it back to him. Byleth waited a bit before awkwardly taking both from her. He looked at the notebook, and squinted his eyes to read the smallest handwriting he’d ever seen.

  
“Please dont call on me for anything”

“Just send the textbook to my room and ill read it i promise”  
“Maybe do training if we had to”

-Bernadetta Von Varley

He noticed that her name was signed extravagantly, as if practiced several times over. Her signature was just as fancy as her writing looked to be. He smiled as he read it and finally spoke to her. “Would you like to stop by the mess hall with me?” He spoke.

Bernadetta ran like nobody else could. She could feel his breath on her neck. She knew that he had drawn his sword, that sword which he knew how to use oh so well through years of training, and killing. She swore she could feel the wind slice in half as he lunged at her back, the end of the sword almost cutting the back of her uniform. She ran, making strides and bounds past the cobblestone path, zooming past the tea garden, sprinting through the main halls before she could see the safety of her dorms. She could lose him here. Nobody else would notice if he’d struck her down in the middle of the main hall, or swung at her leg, making her trip, before he’d tie her up and beat her senseless, just like father… She shook her head and kept running. She serpentined through the wooden poles that connected the dormitories, before landing at her door. 

Quick as a flash, she yanked it open and slammed it behind her, hands going a mile a minute as she adjusted the lock to her door. After it was securely fastened, she leapt into her bed and pulled the covers tight over her head, clinging them to her face. She kept her eyes shut tight, causing her head to hurt, for about five minutes before she knew that he hadn’t followed her in. She slowly poked her head above the covers, taking in the familiar sight of her room, before finally relaxing. She shivered in relaxation before laying her head in her pillows. She thought about what the professor had written. Would she still have to attend class? She hoped not. She really hoped not, in fact. She hoped she wouldn’t have to talk to another human being again for the rest of her life. She thought about what she had written in response to the professor. Private training sessions? Bernadetta hit herself on the forehead. Stupid, stupid Bernie. She couldn’t have given him a better chance to murder her if she… Well, she couldn’t really think of anything easier than private training sessions. 

She felt like she could scream, but she knew that would bring more attention to her. Why, why, why, had Caspar said that about Bernadetta? It would be his fault if she ended up dead, although he probably wouldn’t care. Maybe him and the professor were in cahoots. She eventually sighed and rolled over. She supposed her day would go on as usual, she would just have to appreciate it more since she would be murdered soon. She would wait until it was dark out, then sneak to the mess hall to grab whatever leftovers they had. She would spend the rest of the day writing, although she predicted a dark spirit would haunt her pages as it haunted her mind. What could she do about Byleth…

Byleth had an eventful day outside of class. He went to the mess hall with the rest of his students, enjoying a lunch with Edelgard and Dorothea, who were quite chatty. All he could do was smile and nod, but Dorothea and Edelgard couldn’t stop talking about his “mysterious past”. He would’ve felt happy to enlighten them if only he could get a word in. Petra had shown him some of her Brigid cooking, and he had met with some other students at the training ground. Of course, he stopped to discuss some things with the rest of the monastery’s staff, but overall it was a pleasant day. He hoped by the end of the month he would train his class well enough to go on their first mission. It was growing dim, and as he walked back to his private dorm, he stopped by a particular door. How would he deal with Bernadetta? He hoped she would have enough obligation to leave her room each day to come to class, and they could discuss the chance of private training further, but otherwise he didn’t know. He looked at the slit between the door and the floor, and wondered if he should slide a message through, but thought against it. That was one way to ensure she’d never leave her room again, certainly. Maybe he would stop by the quaint market on the campus grounds and buy her a gift. Maybe then she’d start talking to him. Yes, that seemed like a good idea. Byleth smiled to himself and returned to his dorm. Maybe Bernadetta would make an alright student after all.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth tries to get Bernadetta a gift to make her feel more welcome, but gets more than he bargained for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a shorter one this time. Leave a comment if you have something to say.

The day after his first class was when Byleth discovered the routine of the monastery: Days would alternate between classes before lunch on one day, and classes after lunch the next. Byleth wandered the school grounds, stopping by the fishing spot and managing some catches. He met up with some of his students and had pleasant conversations, before he remembered the marketplace. It was quite an extravagant affair, decorated wagons from all parts of the continent stopping by to offer their wares. A smithy, an armorer’s shop, and what seemed to be a recruiter was stationed there as well. Byleth aimlessly browsed their goods until he came across what he was looking for: A quaint cart stocked with a variety of different items and trinkets. As he looked all the items over, he searched for something inoffensive that the shy girl would have fun with. A notebook of some sort? A diary? A custom inkwell? Byleth was never good with this sort of thing. His eyes stopped on what looked like some stuffed animal. A large looking teddy bear that had been adorned with faux armor. The stuffed warrior would be a perfect gift for someone like Bernadetta, he hoped. As he waited in line he questioned whether using funds directly from the Church of Seiros specifically meant for his class on stuffed animals was the right thing to do, but Seteth had never specified what he couldn’t spend his money on, right? He hoped. He took his new prized possession and walked towards the dormitories. 

Bernadetta hummed very faintly to herself as she worked on her novel. She couldn’t shake the interaction from Byleth yesterday from her head. Stupid stupid Bernie! Unmarriageable! How would she ever be married if she couldn’t get the courage to talk to someone! She dropped her quill and held her head in her hands as the memory of yesterday haunted her. The paralyzing fear of being called upon in class, and how Byleth had confronted her after class. She could already remember the sound of her heartbeat in her chest drowning everything out as he handed the notebook off to her. The way he had smiled a killer’s smile at her after he took it back. She tried to shake her head and clear the thoughts from her mind, but she couldn’t. Would she go to class today? Byleth said she might not have to. But he wasn’t really sure about anything either. Bernadetta was broken out of her thoughts as she heard a knocking on the door.

A familiar voice rang out. “Bernadetta? Do you want to talk about class a bit?” and then a pause. She shook in her chair. She needed time to think, but time was passing by too quickly to formulate a response. She didn’t know how long it was before another knocking on the door. “I’ve brought you something you might like.” Bernadetta was stunned. She was trying to process all the information being given to her. She realized that during all this she hadn’t responded. She needed to say something. Do anything. But she couldn’t. All she could hear was the drip, drip, drip, of ink flowing off her quill onto her desk. Her mouth started to move slightly, but nothing came out. Then, she heard the unmistakable sound of wood creaking, as the door began to slightly open. What? How was that-

Bernadetta had forgotten to lock the door. Goddess. Goddess. Goddess help her, Goddess pray for her and carry her dead body to the afterlife. Bernadetta had forgotten to lock the door. She felt her soul leave her body as the door continued to open. She could see the face of Byleth poking through the crease of the doorframe. She tried to move, but she couldn’t. Byleth was entering her room.

Help her.

Byleth had already begun to open the door before he started to think about it. He hadn’t heard anything from inside, she was likely out doing something. Was barging into somebody’s room seen as disrespectful? She had left it unlocked. Byleth remembered the days where a restful sleep was suddenly interrupted by a mercenary running into his tent and alerting him they were under attack. Either way, the sight still surprised him as Byleth opened the door. Bernadetta sat on her chair, but when he entered the room, she sat up, quick as a flash. He tried to make the situation more comfortable by smiling and remarking “Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt you. I can come back later, if you’d like.” Bernadetta staggered backwards, falling onto her bed. She began to moan. Small sounds came out of her mouth. “Nnnn-nn… Na…” Byleth was rather alarmed. He quickly stepped into her room and closed the door behind him. 

“Are you alright? Do you need help?” He tried to step closer but she responded by sinking back towards the wall. She tried to say something, anything, to scream for help, but all that came out was nothing. Not even a whimper. Byleth looked around. Was she choking? Was she in pain? Byleth continued to step closer, watching Bernadetta closely. In a corner of his mind, he thought that him behind closed doors with a student, backed up against the wall, trying to scream, wasn’t much of a good look. He blushed a bit. Should he call for Manuela? Byleth crouched down to her level and looked her in the eyes.

He thought she could see her tearing up a bit. Byleth spoke. “You’re going to be alright, I’m going to get help for you, okay? I’m going to call the nurse. You’re going to be fine.” Byleth tried to comfort her as he would a wounded animal. He leaned down and stroked his hand through her hair gently, his other hand reaching down to her arm slowly and squeezing her hand with his. Bernadetta had stopped crying at this point, and seemed to be a bit more relaxed. Byleth continued to stroke her hair, and slowly moved his hand down to rub her back. Bernadetta felt relaxed. More than she had ever felt in a long time. When her mother went away, she no longer ever had moments like this with her father. It felt good to be held in a way she hadn’t been for a very long time. Despite all her better interests, Bernadetta found herself leaning into Byleth’s touch. As he caressed her back, she found herself wanting to wrap a blanket around herself and forget about everything, feeling Byleth’s touch as long as she could. Eventually, Byleth stopped and finally stood up. He looked behind him at the door, then back to Bernadetta who had looked up. Byleth walked over to Bernadetta’s desk, and retrieved the bear he had dropped earlier. He smiled and placed it on the bed next to her. “I got this for you at the market earlier. As a gift.” He paused for a bit. “I want to see you in class today, alright? I won’t call on you, I promise. Just take good care of yourself, Bernadetta.” He began walking towards the door. “Maybe we can head to the mess hall together today sometime, okay?” Finally, he turned his head back to her and gave her a final smile before walking out the door. The door closes behind him, and when Bernadetta stands up to lock the door, she hesitates, just for a moment.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bernadetta has a day out on the training field, but can't find the right skills to deal with handling a bow. Meanwhile, Byleth is trying to whip his students into shape in an attempt to prepare them for their upcoming battle.

It would be three weeks until the Black Eagles house had their first in the field mission, and Byleth could not be more concerned. Today’s class would not take place in the classroom, but instead in the training arena, with the students learning firsthand how to properly protect themselves and wield weapons. For a group of complete beginners, they did manage to do surprisingly well. Walking down the line, he could already see who would be best at what, and what he should assign training for. Byleth continued to study their performances. All the time they had for training would be invaluable, rushing them into battle now would end in a massacre. The girls seemed to be more interested in chatting than refining their skills, and the boys seemed to be trying to one up each other with who could create the flashier manoeuvre. 

Byleth thumped a staring off into space Lindhardt on the back. “Pay attention. You’re going to be in a real fight in three weeks, and you’ll need to know how to protect yourself.” Lindhardt sighed. “Battle. Such a barbaric notion of conflict resolution…” Byleth looked at him sternly. “Well, no matter what you think on the matter, your friends are going to be there with you, and you’ll need to know how to protect them. Now get back to work.” Lindhardt groggily reopened his spellbook and continued his practice. Byleth felt a tapping on his shoulder and turned around. “Professor, have you read  _ The Ardestrian Lioness _ ? Me and Edie were talking about how much you resemble the heroines sidekick, and we were wondering-” Byleth cut Dorothea off. “Dorothea. Learning basic magic is the most important skill you can learn in your career. If you can’t make a great basic fireball, you’ll never be able to make a good meteor. Battle’s in three weeks, and I don’t want to have to take you back to the monastery in a casket.” Dorothea placed her hand on her chest, shocked. “Wow, professor! So serious! What a dashing commander you are.” She chuckled. Byleth forced a smile. “Very funny. Get back to work, now.” 

Byleth looked back at the training fields. All these kids had potential, he just needed to wring it out of all of them. Three weeks. He needed to plan very well for this to work. He’d go down the line individually and meet with all of them, give them some tips, let them hone their skills. Call for a break once everyone has learned some good lessons. As he scanned the training fields, he looked towards the far end at the archery range. Bernadetta, struggling with a bow, hands shaking, fired another arrow towards the target. Byleth’s eyes trailed the particularly slow arrow soar through the air, before landing five feet away from the target, joining a sea of other arrows. He watched Bernadetta shake and tremble after this defeat, sitting down on the ground and putting her head in her hand. After what seemed like about a minute, she stood up again and was ready to nock another arrow, but was interrupted by Byleth. “Hey, Bernadetta, let me help you with that.” Bernadetta noticeably didn’t freeze, but instead looked towards Byleth as he approached her. Bernadetta surprisingly gave a meek wave, which Byleth reciprocated in kind. Byleth stepped in close, and Bernadetta froze a bit, but overcame it. But that sense of confidence was shattered when Byleth placed his arm over hers and continued to instruct. “Your problem is that you aren’t pulling the bowstring back enough. It might seem like you’ve pulled it back as far as it can go, but it’s made to stretch, as you’ll soon find out.” Byleth pulled on Bernadetta’s arm, guiding hers back, until the bowstring was at its limit. Byleth relaxed, and Bernadetta returned to her starting position. She shuddered as Byleth left her arms with a squeeze. “Try it while I watch, then I’ll leave you be, alright?” Bernadetta wished she could tell him that she couldn’t do anything while he was watching, but she couldn’t. Instead, Bernadetta stood frozen like a statue, hands on her bow, looking at Byleth. Byleth smiled back, trying to comfort her. Bernadetta thought she would die. She knew so. Byleth was one of those sick psycho killers that made their enemies dig their own graves. If she didn’t hit the target, he would kill her right there, or rip all her fingers off so that she would never be able to draw a bow again. If she didn’t hit a bullseye, he would beat her senseless in an act of rage, like her father. He would strike her in her head and watch her fall to the ground, and as she would try to crawl away, he would stamp on her hands. Bernadetta saw Byleth, crouching down to her prone position on the ground, broken and bleeding, and giving that smile of his. He would kick her once, maybe twice, before casually dismissing class and going back to his office, taking her with him. He would tie her up to his desk, and keep her as his sick, crippled, pet, starving her of food unless she obeyed his every order.

Byleth looked around as he stood in front of Bernadetta. The other students seemed to be training well. He whistled a slight tune as he turned his attention back to the archery range. Bernadetta had been frozen for about a minute now. Byleth tapped his foot remembering a jaunty rhythm he had heard back at a tavern nearby Garreg Mach. Byleth cleared his throat a bit and looked back to Bernadetta. Still wide eyed with fear. Had she blinked? He hoped so. Byleth thought that maybe giving Bernadetta more time for her response, showing her that she could be more comfortable around her, and that he wasn’t going to hurt her was the right thing to do. But, maybe this approach wasn’t working. Maybe it was two minutes now. Maybe she was having a laugh at his expense. Seeing how far she could take this ruse, and exploit her supportive teacher. Byleth looked back into her terrified eyes and immediately reconsidered. Byleth wondered what he should do. At this point he thought he should’ve definitely cut in and said something by now. But his strategy was to wait, to give her enough time to formulate a thought, and interrupting that now would defeat the purpose. But then again, he didn’t really have all day. But good, social people were supposed to be understanding, and Byleth wanted to be that for his students. He decided that he would repeat the question. 

“Bernadetta, do you think you can try to make a shot on your own?”

Byleth grabbed Bernadetta by her throat and lifted her up with ease. Bernadetta began to fight him, but her weak arms did nothing as they pounded against Byleth’s vice like grip. Her legs flailed underneath her uselessly, trying to kick Byleth off, but she was too small. “You can’t fight me Bernadetta. You’re too weak. Too small for someone like ME!” Byleth yelled, shoving her back up against the wall of a pillar in the training arena. Bernadetta screamed and squealed, beating her hands against Byleth even harder than before, but still to no avail. Byleth chuckled again. “Too useless to even approach me. The only person that’s ever shown you kindness. The only person that’s ever tried to understand you.” He smiled a fanged, toothy grin, as he looked deep into her eyes before leaning in. “Unmarriageable doesn’t even begin to describe you.” Suddenly, Byleth pushed forwards, pulling Bernadetta into a passionate kiss. He brought his hands down from her neck and caressed her body gently but sternly, before Bernadetta finally pulled away. She looked at the face of her attacker before she herself dived back into Byleth’s face, as his tongue penetrated her mouth and began to wrestle with hers. Byleth continued to hold her even closer as he increased the kiss’s ferocity. Soon, he broke the kiss, before quickly diving back into her, beginning to start a trail of kisses down her neck, looking her in the eyes before grinning as he began to unbutton her blouse…

Byleth had stood there long enough. Now Bernadetta was blushing. He wondered if she knew the situation was embarrassing. Byleth picked the bow out of her hands to no resistance, before pulling an arrow from her quiver as well. He demonstrated the methods he had shown her. “Now remember, stretch the bowstring back as far as you can, then stretch it even more, alright? You won’t break it, don’t worry.” Byleth aimed the bow towards the target. “Remember, based on the distance, you might want to aim it up a bit. What you’re looking at right now from where I am to the target is where you’re typically going to be engaging enemies. Now, once you’ve got it pulled back, and aimed it up a bit, then let go.” Byleth, true to his word, released the bowstring. The arrow flew by, quick with force, and finally stuck into the target. It wasn’t a bullseye, but needless to say it was quite better than Bernadetta’s attempts. He looked back at her. She had surprisingly moved, and watched him intently. When he looked at her, she blushed before looking away. “Alright, I’ve gotta help the other kids now, but try to get some good practice in, alright?” Before he left however, he wrote something up quickly on his notebook, before (sloppily) tearing out the page and leaving it at the archery stand. He moved on to assist the other students with their own individual struggles.

Bernadetta could practice much better now without anyone else observing her, and Byleth’s advice was quite useful. She found that the more she drew the bowstring back, the better her performance was. It was hard to position herself once she brought it all the way to it’s limit, but she got better at it with time. Aiming was the hard part, but there weren’t many techniques that could improve upon that than repetitive practice. Her arrows thunked into the target stand more and more, and soon she was beginning to reliably hit the stand every time. Before she knew it, practice was over, and everybody began to shuffle off to lunch. Bernadetta finally welled up enough courage to grab Byleth’s note off the stand next to her. 

“Bernadetta, can you please meet me this evening after dinner has been served? I’d like to further discuss an individualized education plan with you (that may include not attending classes!) and I would like to get to know you better. I’ll be in the tea gardens around dinner’s end.”

(P.S I am sorry for my intrusion into your quarters yesterday. I promise that it won’t occur again.)

Bernadetta almost dropped the note, but caught herself and clutched it tightly. No matter what she had thought about Byleth, this had sealed it. She recognized that the first day she met him, his attempt to communicate with her was simply to lure her out. His intrusion into her quarters on the second day (he had probably sabotaged the locks come to think of it) and now today he had given her an official time of death. But something in her mind tried to convince her she was wrong. She remembered the comfort she felt as she clung to his arms in her room after panic overcame her, his gentle caressing of her back, his gentle invitations to lunch (and every time, she hadn’t technically said no) and his constant attempts to sympathize with her. She remembered his gentle touch on her arms as he taught her to fire the bow properly, and stopped. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. Well, maybe. There was still a probability that she would die rather horribly, but she was ready to try this time.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bernadetta and Byleth talk training.

The mess hall (Byleth had to start calling it a dining room at some point, apparently it was bad decorum to refer to it as a mess hall) was serving dinner. Byleth sat with most of his students who all happened to have gathered there at the same time. His students chatted away with each other, and sometimes their conversations would drift slowly over to him, and he would give a curt, quick answer. Dorothea and Edelgard naturally were fixated on his “mystique” but the rest of the class was just enjoying dinner. The monastery’s cooking was much better than the rations Jeralt’s mercenary company took along with them to the front line, but Byleth wasn’t a picky eater. That was a trait you couldn’t afford to have in his line of work. Byleth enjoyed the rather relaxed atmosphere of sitting around with his students, and at one point he contributed with a story about his mercenary days with Jeralt. The students paid rapt attention to him as he spoke, and by the end they were left stunned and began to shout questions at him about his line of work. Byleth saw himself finally sinking into trustful bonds with his students, and thought that doing this more often would improve his relationship with them greatly. Still, he couldn’t keep his mind on his student’s social bond throughout dinner, as his mind kept drifting off to the thought of the impending battle- and Bernadetta. He didn’t want to be responsible for the death of one of these kids, that was one thing for certain. He would need more constant training. Maybe enlist the aid of the other faculty to help teach them. Alois, Catherine, and the knights would be a good addition to the training regiment. Their experience would help manage the individual students, especially in the art of command. If he utilized more individual teaching and lesson plans, and had the students help out around the monastery (maybe attend to the stables and such) they could also develop experience from that. Perhaps-

Byleth’s thoughts were cut off by a fork stabbing into his arm. Well, it was more of a gentle poke. He looked over to Edelgard.

“Professor? Are you okay? Hello?”  
He looked around to see that the entire table had stopped their conversation and was looking at him expectantly.

Byleth nodded. “I’m alright. Just planning ahead. The first battle is coming and I want us to be ready.”  
Ferdinand spoke up. “I will promise you on my honor, that we will succeed in this first trial of combat. You don’t need to worry about us, professor.” Byleth chuckled. “Judging by the way you handled a spear yesterday Ferdinand, you could see why I have some concerns.” The rest of the class laughed, but Ferndinand looked deadpan and slightly crossed. “If it is my honor you are challenging, then I will succeed, I assure you.” Byleth nodded. “I’m glad to hear Ferdinand, but I was just teasing. You shouldn’t be pressured to be able to learn how to handle a weapon so quickly.” Except, if you didn’t, you would assuredly wind up dead on the field, Byleth neglected to add. Byleth stuck his fork back into his meal and swished it around. The rest of the class chattered on about the monastery and their day, Dorothea and Petra getting into a conversation about Byleth and his shady past. Byleth paid them no mind, and continued to think about the battle ahead. All he could think about was his responsibility to keep the students safe. He needed to make sure they could defend themselves, or else they wouldn’t come back alive. He only needed time. He prayed he had enough.

Venna had done it. She had defeated the dragon prince at the High Mountains with the help of all of her companions, the most important of them all being her latest ally. They had just met at the nearby city of Garrenheim, and he had worked as an army soldier before retiring to a life of writing treatises on warfare. Despite this, he was very young, and rather attractive as well. But Venna hid her true feelings for her, for the prophecy which she had to prevent had taken up her time. But with the defeat of the dragon prince, perhaps she could finally tell him how she truly felt. She was in her room at a local inn, and heard a knocking on the door. Venna stood up to open the door, to find the dashing rogue that had preyed upon her thoughts standing in front of her. She was nervous, but confident. “Hello, Eisen. You look beautiful in the moonlight.” She said flirtatiously. But Eisen stayed stoic as always, and pushed past her into her room. Venna closed the door behind him.

“What are you doing up so late?” Asked Venna.

Eisnen sat down on her bed. “I could ask you the same question.” He stated, deadpan.

Venna blushed. “I couldn’t sleep. What about you?”  
Eisnen chuckled. “Couldn’t sleep, could you? I wonder why that would be. Could it be because you were spying on me in the hot spring?”   
Venna gasped. So he had seen her! She couldn’t resist when she heard from one of her companions that Eisen was stopping by the hot springs. She witnessed his muscular form in the waters, the sunlight rippling through the air on his lean form, his chest bared to the world, and his azure eyes matching his hair wet and sticking to him.

Eisen stood up from her bed and walked over to her slowly. He put one hand on her neck, and the other behind her on her back. The hand on her neck tightened, as his other hand drifted down towards her firm behind and squeezed.

“I think you deserve a form of… punishment for your actions.”

Venna could only moan and mouth her lusty approval.

Bernadetta’s hand was shaking. She put her quill down. She would have to stop writing for now, she was getting too hot and bothered to keep going. She’d take a breather and keep going. She lay down in her bed, feeling heat wash across her body. Then her eyes widened. Her meeting with Byleth! It was tonight! Where had he said to meet? Oh, she was going to screw this up! The tea gardens, she would meet him there. Bernadetta unlocked her door and left her room, and began to sneak around the monastery. She took back paths and side streets through the monastery, her job made a bit easier since some people were still at dinner. Finally, as she crept through the brush, she made it to the tea garden. She saw Byleth sitting at one of the tables off in the corner. At least that was nice. She slowly inched closer to the table, hands clasped together. Byleth spotted her and waved.

“Nice to see you, Bernadetta! Come on over!”

Not so loud! Someone might hear! But Bernadetta couldn’t say anything. She quickly dashed over and sat down. In front of her was a cup of tea, still hot. She looked nervously at Byleth, then down to her tea. She tried to remember the books she read on poison. How did they recognize poison from looking at a drink? She couldn’t remember. The only way was to taste it. She picked up the cup, her hands shaking. She took a sip. Then another. Still nothing, but the tea was sugary. She was worried. Would it feel like she swallowed a razor? Would her throat start bleeding before she would gargle up blood? Would she be fine, until she suddenly felt a knife stab from inside her? She blinked. Oh, she was done for, that was for certain. Byleth drank a gulp from his own cup and smiled at her. “How has your day been going, Bernadetta?” Bernadetta smiled a weak smile, and gave a thumbs up. Byleth beamed. “That’s good to hear! I’ve been busy dealing with lesson plans and the like.” Byleth took another sip. She tried to remember if she saw him pour their tea from the same pot. If he did, that meant she was safe. Or was she? An elaborate murder suicide? One final tea party before he accomplished his life goal of killing her? She gulped. Byleth leaned in. “Read any books lately?”

She wanted to tell him that she was writing one of her own, actually. That he was in it. But she said nothing and simply nodded her head. She took another sip. This tea was pretty good, actually. She wanted to ask what blend it was, but she was too nervous. Byleth kept sipping on his tea, before finally finishing it. He sat back in his chair, seemingly waiting for Bernadetta. Bernadetta sipped down most of her tea. Byleth slid his notebook across the table.

“Do fill this out, will you? I’d like to know more about you.”

Bernadetta nodded and took the notebook in her hand.

_Hello, Bernadetta! I’d like you to fill out this small form so we can pursue an individual education plan together._

_I would like to attend classes with all my peers: Yes/No_

_I would like to attend classes with particular people: Yes/No_

_I would like to attend private classes with a faculty member (other than Byleth): Yes/No_

_I would like to be transferred to another class: Yes/No_

_I would like to attend private classes with Byleth: Yes/No_

_Additional Notes:_

Bernadetta looked at the paper given to her. What surprised her was not the questions asked, but the sense of care she got from reading it. This was… More attention she had gotten from anyone in her life, probably. Her dad gave her attention, but it was always the wrong type of attention. Her mother was never ever around, and the only friend she had was that gardener boy, but he was beaten half to death in front of her. She circled no on everything except the last question. Her hand was shaking as she wrote in the additional notes. Before she knew it, she could feel wetness surrounding her eyes. No, no! Not like this! Good wives don’t cry, that was what father had told her! No no no no NO! But Bernadetta couldn’t hold back. She dropped the notebook to the table and held her hands in her head as her tears dripped through to the table. So stupid, so unmarriageable. Bernadetta couldn’t stop crying. Byleth stood up from the table, ignoring the notebook. He walked over to Bernadetta’s side and crouched down, slinging one arm towards her back and rubbing it gently, whilst his other hand grasped Bernadetta’s hand that obscured her left eye. He brought the hand gently to her knee and squeezed it. Byleth was getting better at physical comforts. In fact, he rather enjoyed it. Bernadetta continued to vocallessly sob, mouth open but letting out no sound. Unmarriageable! UNMARRIAGEABLE! Bernadetta kept sobbing, craning her head to one side as Byleth’s hand gently stroked her back. Byleth looked to the notebook as Bernadetta continued to weep, to see what she had written in her notes.

_Thank You._

  
  


Bernadetta had stopped crying after a while, and drank heavily into her tea. She laid her head on the table. She was supposed to talk to Byleth, to figure out what they were going to do, but she had messed up and ended like this instead. Byleth hummed to himself to comfort her, pouring her another cup of tea. Bernadetta took a large gulp. She saw as Byleth slid the notebook across the table again, and Bernadetta looked down.

_I’ll send you the course textbook, and we’ll meet on class days at the training yard after dinner to work together. Does that sound good?_

Bernadetta nodded to Byleth quickly. She continued to gulp down her tea, welcoming a fresh drink of liquid after crying so much. Byleth spoke. “Listen, I know you don’t like talking, and I get it, but if you have anything you want to say to me, then tell me. On paper, with your mouth, while we’re training, whatever. I’m here for you, alright Bernadetta?”

Bernadetta nodded again, looking down into her tea. She managed a meek smile. She had finished her tea.

“Have you eaten anything today?”

Bernadetta blushed and shook her head no. She wanted to say that she was fine, she waited until it was late in the night to collect scraps, and that he didn’t need to worry anything about her, but she remained silent.

Bernadetta and Byleth sat in the dining room, at a table far away from the others. Most students had already had dinner and left, but some still remained surprisingly. Bernadetta had finally taken Byleth up on his offer to eat together, it seemed. Bernadetta was in no mood to commune with Byleth, instead shocked by the freshness of the food. Eating the cake prepared fresh instead of swooping in several hours later to eat the remains was wonderful. She paid no attention to the outside world as she shoveled fresh food down her gullet. Byleth didn’t eat as much, already having dinner with the rest of his students, but he felt like eating together would make Bernadetta comfortable. Bernadetta finally cleared her plate and smiled contently. She leaned forward and looked into Byleth’s azure eyes, him not noticing as he dug into a slice of mutton. Eventually, he too cleaned his plate and looked up at her. “I think we ought to get some sleep now, alright?” He stood up and walked out of the room with Bernadetta trailing behind him. They eventually stopped at her dorm room. Bernadetta opened the door and looked back at him. He waved. “Good night, Bernadetta! I can’t wait to train with you tomorrow!” He began to walk away before Bernadetta grabbed the back of his cloak. She opened her mouth.

“Thanks.”

Byleth smiled at her.

“Anytime.”


End file.
